Friday, January 27, 2006

Parrots Remember What You Want Them to Forget. Lonelyhearts Pawn Shop. 3.


Do you ever feel pressure to do something that makes you uncomfortable? Are you ever rushed into a decision? That was certainly the case this week. A sales person wearing a black jacket and bold green shirt came into Queenly Pawn the other day and offered me the deal of my life on cat food.

"Buy 100 bags and get 150 bags free."

It sounded too good to be true, but I couldn't resist.

So, I signed the contract and took delivery of 100 big bags of Lucky Cat Catfood, and then received 150 small bags of Lusty Cat, a catnip-laced aphrodisiac for felines.

Needless to say, my life has been turned upside down. All 11 of my cats rub, maul, and try to tear open the little bags. It does no good to hide them. The cats scratch and claw in their attempts to get at them. It has even attracted a battalion of community strays. What should I do? Please send me your ideas.

Tear a small piece of paper into six small scraps. Number each scrap from 1 to 6. Then, throw them in the air, let them land, and then choose one (randomly). Read the number. Pick the prediction that corresponds. This is your fate for the week.

You looked in the mirror and you were spouting profanity at the frightening image you saw there. Never mind that it was you. You have lost control today, and all you can think of is damage control. How do you minimize the impact? You can either muzzle yourself or simply accept it. You never know. There may be kernels of wisdom in there somewhere. At the very least, people will leave you alone once they see you talking to yourself in the mirror. Despite the chaos this will cause, you will be exceedingly lucky today. A big deal is around the corner.

You've been thinking of tiny, delicate things to pick up with sharp, pointed sticks. This does not necessarily apply to food items. They could be trinkets, stock market tickertape, balloons, and a few fires to jump over on the first day of Spring.

Soft, supple, and perfect for padding about the house. You are alone, and you've been alone for as long as you can remember. You complain about a lack of companionship, but if you are honest, you'll see that you prefer things just as they are. It is perfectly okay to admit it. Now, see if you can slip out of your house without being noticed. You will need to be as invisible as possible this next week.

You are running the risk of sabotaging what could be the love of your life, and you need to maintain your poise. The stars are positioned to help you, and positive energy is flowing your way. Love is triggered by a thought, not a feeling. Listen carefully and consider every word that is spoken to you. Look at the gestures, facial expressions, and the contexts of your important conversations, and realize that people communicate with more than words. Messages are not so hidden if you know how to listen.

Oh glorious joy! You're sailing away, carried by the brisk breeze of summer. Where will you go? Where do you want to go? Right now, you are somewhere many kilometers away from the shore, headed toward the center of a giant inland sea. Is that where you want to be? Trackless waters are a comfortable screen - "white noise" for the eyes and the mind - but when you finally come down, will it be with a splash or a thud? The soft landing spells instant death. The hard landing means you're on terra firma and will have to go on working for a living, but at least you're still alive. Pay your bribes to the fates and the muses, say thank you, and don't look back.

The antique crystal is cracked but still serviceable. The tea is almost boiling and you feel a sense of commitment. Friendship is more important than ever to you, especially in days of uncertainty, change, and suspicion. A friend once mentioned "trust must be earned." This may be true, but remember that friendship is given. Why are you reluctant? Give first. Take a chance. Yes, it's risky, but you will be repaid a thousand times for your generosity and patience. Your friendship is more valuable than words can describe. Remember that always.

Sunday, January 22, 2006

Have Courage. Lonelyhearts Pawn Shop. Week 2.


I had a very interesting customer yesterday. She came into Queenly Pawn with a box of jewelry she had designed herself. Each piece of jewelry was in the shape of a cat, and each cat had its claws out.

Why are the cats showing their claws? I asked? It's a warning!

I took a closer look at her. She had dark, straight hair, was slender and seemed quite vulnerable, like a ballerina. Did she feel she had to arm herself with symbols of power and danger? Was it a reminder to herself that she could defend herself if she needed to? I will ask her the next time she comes in.

Queenly Pawn attracts an intriguing clientele.

Remember, you're stronger than you may think.

Ask a stranger to choose a number between 1 and 6. This is your fate for the week.

The journey is long and hard, the legs stretch out and run far ahead of your mind. You feel an affirmation or an "on" switch for something vigorous, life-changing, but absolutely dangerous. Believe in yourself, and the truth are seeking will be revealed to you. Lies will rip themselves in two like rotted cloth. You are scientific in your decision-making: cold, hard, but good. Remember that you are driven by the desire to help humanity. Just do not try to usurp your higher power.

Today may frighten you but you'll eventually overcome your superstitious sense of foreboding. You are reading things today and they make sense. Paragraphs, phrases, words, ink - they are all mirrors of your inner self. You are not ambitious in the conventional sense: you simply want to think that your existence meant something. Your skin soaks up the smell of wonderment. Your hair curls at the absurdity of it all. Think. Act. Then think again. Your words are incredibly powerful.

The mirror image of an eel is not an eel at all. It is a shape, stretched out beyond all hope of reformation, or a color, diluted to a hue the eye can endure. Our cognizance of risk keeps us in dark, underwater caves. At least this is where we're tempted to stay when we want more than we can have. The dark, secret cave is safe. The loft asks for the ability to spread one's wings and fly. The moray eel is required by its destiny to split its time between dark, secret underwater caves and the mind's bright soaring.

Believe in yourself today. Belief takes the miracle and translates into what's needed. We make our way through the debris of reason. I know our family must think of survival, but we realize very quickly that the body survives even when the heart does not. We are inspired by unity. And so, your refusal to say negative things about other people allowed you to become a part of the group, and to feel the strength and encouragement of each person. Believe. Trust. Give a gift to someone today. Give from the heart. Forever goes by in the blink of an eye.

You can learn about yourself today if you contemplate the people around you who are vulnerable. Try to identify with someone who feels fear. Imagine their situations. Understanding one's own psychological history is important - perhaps that will explain the agents of change and emotional attachment. You want, simply, a place to relax. What was perhaps most troubling is the falseness of our perceptions. If you let yourself step beyond the barriers you have been building for yourself, you will go far. You will feel true joy today.

The seasons are changing. Despair makes you wear a mask. You look so much better without it! Suppose we gave up the speckles, indentations, and cracks that make our smiles concrete. From a distance, every woman looks like a clinical psychologist. Up close, everything is something like the dog's blanket - frayed, smelly, and trampled. We are both aware of that life is a series of causes and effects. Only some of us continue to substitute effect for cause. If the seasons are changing, so are you. It gives you a way to say good-bye.

Monday, January 16, 2006

Puppets do not speak on their own. Lonelyhearts Pawn Shop


This is the first of a series of from Lonelyhearts Pawn Shop, a series of letters and weekly "predictions" from the propietress of Queenly Pawn, who has come to be known as the "Pawn Queen." The series can be read in its entirety in Lonelyhearts Pawn Shop, published by Light and Dust Books.

Last weekend, I decided to sell puppets in Queenly Pawn. I think they're cute. Besides, you have to admit that it's fun to imagine yourself with total control over something.

My cats, however, were not so enthusiastic. They explained to me that anything that symbolized the usurpation or loss of free will by an outside agent was profoundly distressing to all felines. I told the cats that humans aren't so finicky. They don't care, just as long as someone gives them just enough food to eat, a place to sleep, and a weekly lottery ticket.

We're happy as long as we can fantasize about winning the jackpot. I will place my order for puppets tomorrow. In the meantime, I'm going to buy myself a lottery ticket.

Puppet or puppet-master?

Ask a stranger to choose a number between 1 and 6. This is your fate for the week.

Perhaps the most famous puppet was Coppelia, the beautiful mechanical doll, whom her creator, Dr. Coppelius, dreams of bringing to life. The Delibes ballet, Coppelia, brings tears of joy and recognition to all the audience. How we long to have our vision of perfection come alive… It is joyous and magical. Today, you will find life in things you previously considered inanimate.

Kukla on the proscenium - the simplicity is ravishing. You're remembering the puppet shows of your childhood - of television, school, neighborhood children. How much do we reveal of ourselves when we animate a little sock and it becomes a puppet. Kukla, Fran, and Ollie… do you remember? You will be very lucky today, especially if you think of your past.

You're obedient, verging on the subservient. Aren't you a bit disgusted with yourself? You were not born to be like this - a sycophantic lap dog who has forgotten what it means to bark, growl, and show resistance. Defend your territory! Bite if you have to. You will reap rewards for standing your ground.

If only foil were as hot as the furnace in which your dreams were forged. You are marvelous, dear. You are on target. Your words glitter when they emanate from your mouth, people shiver when you speak. You are love, dignity, and hope incarnate. Now, don't let your friends down. They are counting on you.

Conquer, conquer, conquer! It's too late. You have already done it. You have made all the right decisions (even if it doesn't seem so), and the magical life you lead is about to erupt in showers of sparks and shimmering light. You should enter politics, dear. Yes. You're that good.

Ahhh-HA!! A Mexican folkloric dance reminds you of the dances you've seen - dances with swords, knives, and fire. Sure, it's a little hard on the knees. But, the energy is primordial, primitive, and something you should maintain in your core being. It will keep you fervent. You will attract people because you care. And, people will respect your survival instinct. What is it they say? That sharks and cockroaches are the only things that would survive a catastrophic environmental event? Ah yes. Indulge yourself in your cockroachness today. Be shameless. You'll survive.

Yep. Stuff I like :)